There's a difference between being afraid of the gun in your face, and being afraid of the possibility for a gun to be put in your face. The former: a response based on present reality - a response based on the circumstances currently in your existence, in the moment. The latter: a response based on an abstraction of the mind - a response to what could be, what might not ever be.
Between the two, which one is really worth the stress - the taxing of emotions - that comes with being afraid?
Usually when I let my mind imagine what it would be like to not pass the exam, I respond based on whatever comes to mind with fear. I was just sitting here thinking about that response and it dawned on me - what am I really afraid of? Is it worth a response of fear?
In the present moment, I'm sitting in my bed with my laptop in my lap, typing out my thoughts. I'm completely comfortable. If I weren't comfortable with this laptop-in-bed situation I could do something to help it - NOW. Sure, something in the next moment could happen that I wouldn't want to happen - but worrying about what could happen in the future does nothing to help me out NOW.
Same with the exam, or any future event. Nothing wrong with being concerned about the future, working right now to make sure things go well in the future - but nothing in the future is worth being afraid.
Word to Jesus.
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Dontcha just love it when you have one of those moments - where something in your head just snaps, clicks, buzzes, lights up (you know?) - and things just become CLEAR - where life just starts to LOOK different? Yup. Call it inspiration. And motivation for this post.
Showing posts with label faith. Show all posts
Showing posts with label faith. Show all posts
Monday, June 15, 2009
Friday, May 22, 2009
Place your bets.
To make a jackpot in the future, you have to place your bets in the present.
- Carrie Bradshaw.
It's possible that I get too much wisdom from watching Sex and the City. Or maybe not. But I was sitting here watching a repeat - the one where they go to Atlantic City for Charlotte's birthday - and Carrie's seemingly trite metaphor about going for what you want (one that I've heard every time I've seen this episode but never bothered to consider) inspired this lightbulb moment!
If you have faith in anything - including yourself - then you have some sort of belief in that thing/person/being about something that you can't yet see. And the faith is there, in part, because you believe that one day, you will see what you believe in. If you truly have faith, then it's likely that you act according to your faith - you'll invest time, energy, emotions, money, etc. because you believe that you will get some sort of result from the object of your faith.
Acting according to faith is a gamble.
You don't know what you're gonna get from "placing your bet" on the object of your faith. There's never any guarantee. Still, you believe that the bet is worth placing, because the jackpot is of tremendous value. It's worth the risk. So you act according to your faith - not by anything you can see.
We live by faith, not by sight. 2 Corinthians 5:7
Now faith is being sure of what we hope for, and certain of what we do not see. Hebrews 11:1
I feel like a gambling addict. I've been doing SO MUCH these past few years, basing my actions, often, on my faith. And that faith is in God mostly - but also, in me, in my abilities, in my untapped potential. Like any gambling addict I've found myself in many tight situations - times when it seemed like I had nothing to gamble. Actually, I'm in one of those tight situations now... a situation that makes me question my faith. All these questions, and yet, I keep on rolling the dice.
If I'm interested in the future jackpot, the time to place my bet is always NOW.
- Carrie Bradshaw.
It's possible that I get too much wisdom from watching Sex and the City. Or maybe not. But I was sitting here watching a repeat - the one where they go to Atlantic City for Charlotte's birthday - and Carrie's seemingly trite metaphor about going for what you want (one that I've heard every time I've seen this episode but never bothered to consider) inspired this lightbulb moment!
If you have faith in anything - including yourself - then you have some sort of belief in that thing/person/being about something that you can't yet see. And the faith is there, in part, because you believe that one day, you will see what you believe in. If you truly have faith, then it's likely that you act according to your faith - you'll invest time, energy, emotions, money, etc. because you believe that you will get some sort of result from the object of your faith.
Acting according to faith is a gamble.
You don't know what you're gonna get from "placing your bet" on the object of your faith. There's never any guarantee. Still, you believe that the bet is worth placing, because the jackpot is of tremendous value. It's worth the risk. So you act according to your faith - not by anything you can see.
We live by faith, not by sight. 2 Corinthians 5:7
Now faith is being sure of what we hope for, and certain of what we do not see. Hebrews 11:1
I feel like a gambling addict. I've been doing SO MUCH these past few years, basing my actions, often, on my faith. And that faith is in God mostly - but also, in me, in my abilities, in my untapped potential. Like any gambling addict I've found myself in many tight situations - times when it seemed like I had nothing to gamble. Actually, I'm in one of those tight situations now... a situation that makes me question my faith. All these questions, and yet, I keep on rolling the dice.
If I'm interested in the future jackpot, the time to place my bet is always NOW.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Three weeks.
I would love it if all that I were concerned about this month was the bar exam.
I remember last July, about three weeks before the exam. Apart from my quotidian affairs, all I had to be concerned about was the bar exam. And three weeks before the exam, that's all I cared to be concerned about. And that's the way it really should be when preparing for any bar exam. There was absolutely nothing else in my world to think about - at all. Even my friends and family: as much as I love them, I didn't even have the space of mind required to miss them three weeks before I took the bar exam last summer. Just me and those two days. It's surreal when I think about how I was just consumed, only, by that one thing.
And I came so close. But close doesn't cut it.
So here I am again, three weeks before the bar exam. Again. This time, however, I would like to today to be three weeks before I pass the bar exam. I wonder if that will be the case, considering that this time around, I have SO much to be concerned about. Matters having to do with the basics of life - the things that some people actually take for granted and for others become serious pressing matters, because they're that important. These are things that actually come way before the bar exam and practicing law in terms of importance to my life. And practicing law is pretty high on the importance scale of my life.
But what do you do when you're back's against the wall?
In the past few weeks, I've learned that when faced with such a situation, I fight.
I've never fought so hard for so much in all my life.
In such a situation, I also take steps out on faith.
Life right now feels like walking on air. Not floating - but taking concrete steps on something that I can't see with my eyes.
It feels as crazy as it probably sounds - but then I remember this - something I've always believed but never have actually lived until now. And it seems less crazy.
Forget learning the law. I've just been learning about myself.
(If only I were a topic on the bar exam!)
When I first learned that I didn't pass the exam, I questioned - "Why me? Why do I have to go through this again?" And although there are times when I still wish that I passed over the summer, I am beginning to see just why.
Things are difficult, but I'm beginning to see that I actually needed this difficulty. Everything that happens has its purpose and you just have to trust that it's for the best.
And if you're so inclined, you trust in God.
"Good timber does not grow with ease; the stronger the wind, the stronger the trees."
- J. Willard Marriott
(Oh, and forgive the rambling nature of this post. I really just needed to let this out! I'd edit - but I really need to get back to work.)
I remember last July, about three weeks before the exam. Apart from my quotidian affairs, all I had to be concerned about was the bar exam. And three weeks before the exam, that's all I cared to be concerned about. And that's the way it really should be when preparing for any bar exam. There was absolutely nothing else in my world to think about - at all. Even my friends and family: as much as I love them, I didn't even have the space of mind required to miss them three weeks before I took the bar exam last summer. Just me and those two days. It's surreal when I think about how I was just consumed, only, by that one thing.
And I came so close. But close doesn't cut it.
So here I am again, three weeks before the bar exam. Again. This time, however, I would like to today to be three weeks before I pass the bar exam. I wonder if that will be the case, considering that this time around, I have SO much to be concerned about. Matters having to do with the basics of life - the things that some people actually take for granted and for others become serious pressing matters, because they're that important. These are things that actually come way before the bar exam and practicing law in terms of importance to my life. And practicing law is pretty high on the importance scale of my life.
But what do you do when you're back's against the wall?
In the past few weeks, I've learned that when faced with such a situation, I fight.
I've never fought so hard for so much in all my life.
In such a situation, I also take steps out on faith.
Life right now feels like walking on air. Not floating - but taking concrete steps on something that I can't see with my eyes.
It feels as crazy as it probably sounds - but then I remember this - something I've always believed but never have actually lived until now. And it seems less crazy.
Forget learning the law. I've just been learning about myself.
(If only I were a topic on the bar exam!)
When I first learned that I didn't pass the exam, I questioned - "Why me? Why do I have to go through this again?" And although there are times when I still wish that I passed over the summer, I am beginning to see just why.
Things are difficult, but I'm beginning to see that I actually needed this difficulty. Everything that happens has its purpose and you just have to trust that it's for the best.
And if you're so inclined, you trust in God.
"Good timber does not grow with ease; the stronger the wind, the stronger the trees."
- J. Willard Marriott
(Oh, and forgive the rambling nature of this post. I really just needed to let this out! I'd edit - but I really need to get back to work.)
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